I'm really tired of all these.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009 ,

10:41 PM

the burning candle has died.

the love between them is really over.

the people made me fed up.

their laughters made me mad.

her tears made me cry.

her tears hurt me deeply.

her sadness, her pain, is what i cannot really understand.

for her, i'm willingly to be the bad guy.

for her, i can't say how i really feels.

for her, i told plenty of lies.

so many that my lies are drowning me.

so many, so many, so many...

mummy, i rather i'm the one going through all those pain.

why don't he love you?

i'm fine with him not loving me, for i'm use to it.

but, why you too? i'm sorry i'm unable to do anything for you.

but today, i'm sorry for not staying strong.

i really cannot take it anymore..

i was mentally prepared, but, things aren't that simple.

i thought i'm fine with me, but i'm wrong.

i'm someone with feelings and emotions.

i'm not a robot, i know what is going on.

yes, i'm not happy, i'm really very very upset!

but, what can i do?

i lost, really feeling very lost.

i'm taking papers on thursday, why is everything

happening now?? all these are making me break down.

i can't focus, i can't concentrate. i don;t know what to do.

i really hate the way things are now.

can i turn back the time?

if i can choose, i rather not be the strong and brave one.

because everyone's thinking i'm strong and brave, therefore

i can go through everything and anything. but, it's not true.

if it is possible, can i not be the strong and brave shimin?

can i show my true-self? can i show everyone how i really am?

tired of everything, tired of life, tired of being the pillar for them.

i need a pillar too..

i'm just a 15 year old girl.....

因为这个家，我笑了。

但是因为这个家，我也哭了。。

♥
xo. SHIMIN 170194. Gone. September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 Thankew. Remove and I'll peel off your skin! Hero: Xuewen. Host: Blogger Base codes: xavqior and Stac'ey	Tuesday, October 6, 2009 , 10:41 PM the burning candle has died. the love between them is really over. the people made me fed up. their laughters made me mad. her tears made me cry. her tears hurt me deeply. her sadness, her pain, is what i cannot really understand. for her, i'm willingly to be the bad guy. for her, i can't say how i really feels. for her, i told plenty of lies. so many that my lies are drowning me. so many, so many, so many... mummy, i rather i'm the one going through all those pain. why don't he love you? i'm fine with him not loving me, for i'm use to it. but, why you too? i'm sorry i'm unable to do anything for you. but today, i'm sorry for not staying strong. i really cannot take it anymore.. i was mentally prepared, but, things aren't that simple. i thought i'm fine with me, but i'm wrong. i'm someone with feelings and emotions. i'm not a robot, i know what is going on. yes, i'm not happy, i'm really very very upset! but, what can i do? i lost, really feeling very lost. i'm taking papers on thursday, why is everything happening now?? all these are making me break down. i can't focus, i can't concentrate. i don;t know what to do. i really hate the way things are now. can i turn back the time? if i can choose, i rather not be the strong and brave one. because everyone's thinking i'm strong and brave, therefore i can go through everything and anything. but, it's not true. if it is possible, can i not be the strong and brave shimin? can i show my true-self? can i show everyone how i really am? tired of everything, tired of life, tired of being the pillar for them. i need a pillar too.. i'm just a 15 year old girl..... 因为这个家，我笑了。但是因为这个家，我也哭了。。